MTV Movie Awards: Popularity Contest Gone Terribly Wrong

Aaaaa so full of Costco pizza :D It was the first time I ever went to Costco so I was pretty excited. I think my favourite purchase was a huge packet of multi-flavoured Hi-Chew candies. If you haven't tried them, you need to get your hands on some!

So last night was the MTV Movie Awards. I normally don't watch these kind of award ceremonies, but my brother wouldn't change the channel so I decided to see what it was all about. I think it was the worst way I could have spent 2 hours of my life. The whole evening was full of staged, random/inappropriate nonsense ... I can't believe people are actually entertained by this.

Without further ado, the list of things that we could have done without:

1) Excessive profanity
Sure, everyone curses - I'm certainly no exception (you should have heard me this morning when my brother sprayed Axe again all over my bedroom), but seriously? The guy who played Carlisle just littered his acceptance speeches with the f word. Was that necessary? Well, that was the entire show. I heard more bleeping than actual words spoken in that 2-hour span.

2) Twilight won everything
Big surprise. Talentless popularity contest, right? I admit, I loved Twilight when it came out as books but by the third novel, it just turned into a spawning ground for squeezing money out of overly-hopeful females. For what it's worth, vampires and werewolves aren't real. As much as I like folklore, in this messed up world of messed up relationships, no girl should ever turn down a real guy for dreams of falling in love with teenage version of Dracula. For what it's worth, my boyfriend treats me much better than Edward or Jacob treats Bella. HAH in your face! See full list of winners here.

3) Asian guy from The Hangover's interpretive dance
Ken Jeong was prancing about in a skin-tight tiger leotard. What an embarrassment.

4) Awkward kisses
Sandra Bullock with Scarlett Johansson? What? I thought they were both ladies. I still don't understand what that was all about and I respect both women as actresses. Worst kiss for the Best Kiss winners: Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson. They ran around in circles on stage and kept putting it off, she slapped him at one point, then they finally smashed faces for a split second and called it a day. Oh yeah, I pity them too, their feet were getting tired of walking on stage every 5 seconds to accept another award *rolls eyes*

5) Kristen Stewart
The more I look at her the more I dislike her. Her terribly awkward and rushed acceptance speech kind of spoke, "Oh whatever, another thing to toss in the dumpster. Thanks everyone. I'm nervous and can't act." Also, that Dolce & Gabanna dress she wore didn't flatter her chest at all. I just highly dislike actors and actresses who are popular by luck and not talent. I'll take Will Smith, Brad Pitt, Sandra Bullock, Meryl Streep any day over Kristen Stewart, Miley Cyrus, Megan Fox, and yes, junior high celebrity crush Orlando Bloom. I'll give it to Taylor Lautner that at least he can do martial arts and act.

6) Katy Perry's outfit
Blue wig, boobs pushed up so sky-high I bet astronauts in orbit could have seen them closely. Yikes. And her song, California Girls, is super catchy but I don't like that the lyrics are insinuating that all California Girls are blonde, slutty, and spend all day humping at the beach. Not classy. Eye makeup isn't bad though.

7) Can you believe that's Tom Cruise?
I don't think it's bad at all, but I'm just impressed actually. Tom Cruise got down in Tropic Thunder garb and danced a number with a sequiny, sparkly JLo.

8) Tom Felton beat out Cristoph Waltz for Best Villain
Booo. Anyone who saw Inglorious Basterds knew how brilliantly Hans Landa conducted villainy. As far as I'm concerned, Draco Malfoy never really did anything right. I didn't like the two people dangling above Tom's head as he tried to give his acceptance speech.

That's it for my rant. If I offended any Twilight fans, know that the power of your love for a fictional vampire (or werewolf) will eventually save the world from nuclear explosions and contain the BP oil leak.

Just so you know, I am planning on watching Twilight: Eclipse in theatres with my boyfriend. Somehow, the awful humour and acting catalyzed the beginning to our "saga." It's an annual tradition : ) I'm just sad it's not released during November, when our anniversary usually is.